I often share my testimony with women about my almost-near disastrous relationship with my only daughter. Five years ago I made hard decisions to change my lifestyle and behavior so I could salvage our relationship when she was a teen. She’s a recent college graduate whose heart and desire is for the Lord. God has worked His grace and power in our home and family.
I’ve shared a lot of things with moms of girls over the years – young moms exasperated with small kids, moms raising preteens fearful of the path their daughter might take, and moms in the trenches with teen girls. Here are twenty things I often share that I’m glad I did in raising a girl, and twenty things I would do over.
20 Things I’d Do Again
Be a stay at home mom to watch her grow
Have tea parties
Play dress ups
Read books to her
Take her to parks
Sing to her
Have play dates
Lay beside her bed and pray for her when she’s sleeping
Take her to museums
Take her on a road trip
Be honest about my life when she asked hard questions
Have her dad intervene when she wouldn’t listen to me
Have her dad date her when other girls had boyfriends
Tell her dad what girls need to hear
Write her notes when she wouldn’t listen to me
Make time for her even when exhausted
Talk to her about sex at age-appropriate levels
Stay up late when she wanted to talk
Stand firmly even when it hurt
Hold her loosely
20 Things I Would Do Over
Trusted God earlier
Trusted God more often
Walked away more
Let her and her brothers work things out more often
Given her space when she demanded it
Realized some things are just that way, and it’s okay
Bit my tongue more
Realized earlier in her life that she’s not me
listened more
lectured less
prayed more
Practiced more patience
Told her I was proud of her
Given up my rights to have the last word
Appreciated her more
Encouraged her more
Shown her unconditional respect
Given more grace
Hugged her more
Held her just one more time
We all have things we wish we could do over. Having a relationship with Jesus Christ makes do overs possible no matter what stage of parenting we’re in. His power also provides wisdom for things we happen to get right.
Somewhere between tea parties and tiaras, little girls grow up. What are things you’ve learned in raising girls, no matter their age? What are things you’re glad that you’ve done? What would you do over in raising girls?
Broken and Beautiful: Brenda has a Master’s Degree in Clinical Mental Health Counseling, and a BA in Education. As a Parent, Counselor and Educator her ministry is helping moms and daughters navigate the tough stuff of life. Have a question for Brenda? Email her at AskBrenda@thewhatvergirls.com
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