That flippant comment you said right there? The one that came out of your mouth so quickly and really without another thought after you said it?
Your daughter heard it, took it in, analyzed it over and over in her mind and after that, late at night when you thought she was already asleep, she was deciding if it made her feel worthy or unlovable.
Your words matter.
Whether they are said as a compliment when she is getting ready for school and you tell her she looks cute even thought she is wearing the same sweat style pants she has worn every day this week or whether they are used to discipline her when you take away her phone because she got a D on her last French quiz.
What we draw into our ears become the beliefs that we take into our hearts.
As women we know this about ourselves. It is how God created us, but yet there are sometimes when I forget and I will say something to my daughter and later she will tell me what she heard me say and it is oh.so.different.
Proverbs 16:24 says, “Gracious words are like a honeycomb, sweetness to the soul and health to the body.”
So before you speak,
For every word, that God may grant you wisdom and the tone to convey the wonder and blessing that you feel for your daughter even if it is word of discipline.
Prayer for our daughters is one of the single most ways to raise them for Him.
Your words to God about her matter.
Look into your daughter’s eyes when you talk. Hear her heart when she says, “Can you help me with homework?” and try to realize it may just be, “Can you sit by me and be close?”
Your words matter even if they are kept to yourself and you sit in sweet silence.
Give her the grace of forgiveness – the same beautiful grace that was given to us while we were still sinners form Jesus. Cherish this time and look on each time you get to speak together as a gift.
I pray as mothers and fathers, raising these teen girls, we might bring sweetness to our daughters’ lives even when we have to tell her it is her turn to take out the dog!